HEAR(t)

When you listen to your heart and when you let emotions win, it's when your faith and obedience are being tested.

It was a very hard decision to follow what I feel, and risking my faith, but Gods spiritual guidance helped me overcome the temptations. I know deep inside me, my flesh is to weak to control myself from not showing my affection, but I continually pray and did not cease from asking the holy spirit to be with me in every actions. Indeed, it was victorious.

It was when I felt the assurance of protection, the hedge of the angels, and Jesus' blood of victory covering me all up the entire day. I am still completely in awe of the Gods revelation in my life.

I hope I can just tell him everything my heart wanted to say, but I would rather hold in me the feelings, than express it without the guidance of God. Now that I know Jesus, I don't want to compromise my faith with emotions. I don't want to compromise my faith if I'm not sure of the person. I always and will always consider God's choice and not my choice. :)

True that I think of him, but I can still control my feelings. Maybe, it's just temporary. I won't risk my heart for nothing.

Hear ----- Heart! <3

Question and Answer

Can you come and take care of me?

It was the hardest question ever thrown.

I would love to say NO, but my heart want to say YES. I want to express what I feel but expressing it is the hardest thing to do. Deep inside me, I know I like you. I know that resisting you was one of the hardest thing I had to. My flesh want the other way, my heart wants the other, my spirit want it straight. It so hard.

I know there's something in you that I couldn't stop myself from thinking of you but there's also a part of me who's trying to control my entire system from bursting my emotions. I know I am an emotional wreck, but I am only emotional when the person is too special for me. When you want it but you can't feel the sincerity, I'd rather follow my own instinct than allowing someone to take a part of me and return it back broken.

We've tried our best to separate ourselves from each other, because we knew how hard it is to be closer. The closer we are, the more attachment we are making. The harder for us to cut the tie of uncertainty. We were successful, but, for how long?

Why are you making it so hard for me?

It's like you are making me choose between,

LIFE OR DEATH?

RIGHT OR LEFT?

UP OR DOWN?

HEART OR MIND?

FLESH OR SPIRIT?

I miss you, but I can't come and take care of you.

CAN YOU COME TAKE CARE OF ME INSTEAD? :)