Unconditional Love

Wow! I failed God but deep within me I know He allowed it to happen because pruning is painful. And I should be hurt to bear fruit, to even be more stronger, to really pursue Him alone and not man. I am not going to stop from sharing God's word. I am a warrior and I am not defeated.

Yes, God is always on time. He sends people for a reason. He send people fora purpose and this time. I am sure I just hit it~ It's bulls eye! God never failed to make me feel that it is not through men that I may earn love but through Him and through me. It's not through my own hard work that I may earn love but through Him. That it is not through actions that I may earn love but through continuously walking the journey with Him.

I rejoice in every failure and I am not going to fail Him again.  I rejoice in every temptation because through it, I am able to resist the next time. I rejoice n my trials because through it, I am strengthened. 

I realized now that for me to grow, I should be pruned hurtfully. I should experience the hotness of fire to purify everything in me. I need to feel pain in taking off all the bad stuff in my life. 

Amazing, I may be hurt but God was never wrong in pruning me. And now, I am looking forward for a different chapter.

I am now pursuing God's love only and not man's love. I am now pursuing God's unconditional love and not man's temporary pleasure and compassion.

God, I know you're here... in my heart--- take away all the bondage in me. I don't need it. It's only you that I need so much. 

I love you

I love you.

Such an awesome words to hear. I haven't heard these words in a while. I haven't felt it for a long time from someone of the opposite sex--- 

"Mr. M" told me he does but it's too fake that it wasn't even coming inside of me. How I wish it was real, how I wish it was true but I am sure it wasn't. "I love you" aren't words but an action words--- If he truly loves me, he could have showed it to me and make an effort for it. But never did I experience any of it. 

I hope when people say this words, they mean it---- they felt it..  Because it aren't just something that should be taken for granted and thrown.. 

Two days ago, someone told me "I love you"-- it didn't bother me but I was so shocked reading those words. Well, maybe because I haven't heard anyone told me I am loved.. not even my friends.. Oh I have one friend who does, Marie---- :) but she only tells me she loves me because I always tell her I love. (It makes sense right?). But with someone you barely know and spend time with, it's near to impossible to hear those words. I am glad the he did but I felt that it's too temporary--- I hope that when people tells me they love me, it's for real and not because they're just under the influence of alcohol.

Those words means a lot to me, it gives me the strength to smile despite the sufferings and pains. And I won't lie, it did surprised me when "Mr. D" said that---- but he made my day. Deep inside me I wished it was true. Deep inside me, I wished he meant it. Deep inside me, I wished he didn't just said it because he was drunk. He's a special friend. Even my closest friends don't say those words to me--- So I am just glad someone did. 

I love you. Deep as it sounds but it can change someone's feelings. And emotions might be fickle sometimes, but it can provide such bliss in your heart that can't be explain by mere words. 

Follower

I am a follower.


Wow! That was heavy. I choose to be a follower of Jesus and not just a fan because I want other people to know that having a life with Jesus is the best thing that ever happened to me. 


Imagine waking up in the morning feeling grateful of everything that God has bestowed in me. I don't even know why I have this feeling, all I know is that Jesus change me. 


I choose to be a follower because I want to share to people that having such kind of faith will not only change you to become a better person but will teach you to Love others without condition, to love others even at their worst, and to love others even without anything in return. 


I choose to be a follower because I want to shout to the world that having Jesus is having life. It gave me more reason to live each day, to bring more people to God's Kingdom. If it weren't because of Jesus, I wouldn't be this excited to wake up in the morning and to just express how wonderful, awesome, marvelous--- and all the beautiful adjectives is an understatement for what I have with Jesus.


I choose to be a follower because I don't want other people to suffer in Hell. I don't want other people to experience pain and be stagnant in pain.  I don't want other people to feel unworthy. I don't want other people to feel unloved. I want them to know that I love them and Jesus loves them and that someone died for them! 


I choose to be a follower because I choose Life. 


I choose God. I choose righteousness. And I choose you! 


I want you to be joyful just as I am joyful.
I want you to have a gently spirit just as I have a gently spirit.
I want you to have peacefulness just as I have peacefulness.
I want you to experience worthiness just as I have worthiness.
I want you to experience LOVE just as I experienced love.


I want you!